I had my first seizure at 21 years old, (May 5, 2017) I had just finished a 12 hour shift at the hospital working as a CCA. I came home and was talking to my mom, we were laughing and having a great time! Out of nowhere I felt my neck turn so tight to the left, that’s the last thing I remember. When I woke up I was on the floor and EHS had arrived. I remember crying, telling my parents “sorry”.

My younger sister had seizures and was diagnosed with epilepsy at 10 years old. I didn’t think it was possible that I could have epilepsy, I figured something else must have caused the seizure. I was seen at the first seizure clinic the following month. After my EEG I was diagnosed with epilepsy August 9,2017. I was absolutely beside myself I was sure there was no way I had epilepsy and there must have been an error in the test!

I was in denial, I didn’t want to take my medication, however I did. The following years I continued to have seizures and my doctor tried different medication combinations and different dosages. I was beyond frustrated I wasn’t able to drive and each time I would get so close to getting my license back again, I would have another seizure. I wanted my life back, I wanted my independence back I wanted to be normal! I was becoming depressed and I was scared to leave the house, in the chance I could have a seizure.

January 2018, I started the LPN course, my boyfriend was amazing he drove me to and from school everyday that he could. If he was unable to I had supportive friends and family that would help me, they made sure I was able to get anywhere I needed. Unfortunately I continued to have seizures during the program, which lead to becoming more anxious and depressed. I talked with my neurologist about my mental health and she told me it was very common, she explained many people with epilepsy share the same feelings. I started a medication for anxiety and depression, which helped! I became less scared of the “what ifs” and started doing things I enjoyed again.

November 20th, 2019, I was able to drive again! I had my independence back, I felt like i was starting to live a normal life! I have been seizure free since that day!

Having epilepsy has taught me so much, how precious life is it has made me grateful. I could choose to be resentful and angry, but I chose to look at the positives. I am so lucky to have a loving family and friends who supported me. Working as a nurse having epilepsy helped me to understand what my patients may be feeling. I could empathize with them, how frustrating it can be to do everything your suppose to and still have no answers or solutions.

I want people to know, things will get better, you are not alone! It’s okay to be upset and frustrated, epilepsy is a part of you, but don’t let it control you.

A cure for epilepsy would be wonderful! A cure would mean I wouldn’t have to constantly think about “what if I have another seizure”. I wouldn’t have to worry about passing epilepsy onto my children and the damage that could cause them. A cure would mean so many people could live their life without worry for themselves and their loved ones! A cure would mean relief!